Ranma Meets Godzilla
by Ariella0022
Summary: It's not as bad as it sounds, really. Basically silliness, some Kuno-bashing, self-insertion, and the usual Ranma stuff.


Okay, I wrote this fic at 1:30 a.m. one night. It took me two hours. It's pretty...interesting. I got the idea with the help of my dad and my brother. Arigato!  
  
Warnings: silly, pointless humor, self-insertion, slightly Kuno-bashing, very strange.  
  
Disclaimers: I don't own Ranma ½, and I most likely never will. I'm getting over it. I only own this fic and the idea for it, and my character that's in it. Please review!  
  
Ranma Meets Godzilla  
  
It was a quiet day at the Tendo Dojo. Suddenly, there was a loud crash, followed by a "Ranma, you jerk!" Kasumi sighed and put her tea cup down. "You'd think he'd have learned by now not to call Akane a macho chick."  
  
"Well, he isn't as bright as he looks," Nabiki said.  
  
"Yeah, but the repair costs for the roof are getting to be a problem."  
  
Just then, the news cut through the TV program they were watching. "We interrupt this program to bring you urgent news," the announcer said. "We have just received word that there is a giant monster bringing havoc downtown."  
  
"Hey, everyone! Come look at this!" Nabiki called.  
  
They came into the room as Ranma entered through the front door. "What's going on?" he asked as he saw everyone watching the TV. Akane pointed to the screen and he sat down. They all watched silently as the announcer continued.  
  
"-your survival. We now take you to Catherine who is live at the scene."  
  
The camera switched to one downtown, where people were running around and screaming, with a giant lizard-like thing stomping around in the background. A woman stood in front, ignoring the chaos around her. "Thanks, Bob. As you can see, this mean green monster is none other than Godzilla, back in Tokyo. So far, she has leveled 17 buildings, destroyed 22 cars, and has wounded and killed countless people. Police are trying to subdue this beast, but so far no one has been able to get close enough to stop her." Godzilla stopped and turned towards Catherine, then walked over to her. Catherine was oblivious to this - even as the cameraman started backing away - and continued talking. "We urge you to stay calm and not panic, and to stay indoors or evacuate the city. If confronted with this demon, it is critical to your survival that you-" Her words were cut off as Godzilla leaned down and took her into its mouth, then swallowed. The camera fell to the ground as the cameraman ran away screaming. Godzilla roared, then winked at the camera, giving a peace sign with both hands, er, claws.  
  
The camera then switched back to the studio. "Shocking," Bob declared. "Please stay calm, and don't panic. We now return you to your regularly scheduled program."  
  
Kasumi switched off the TV. "This doesn't look good."  
  
Ranma stood up. "It's just a lizard. If we go downtown, we could probably stop it."  
  
"Oh, my god, did Ranma just suggest we do something together? The world must be ending." Akane said with mock surprise.  
  
Ranma stuck his tongue out at her. "So, who's with me?"  
  
* * * * *  
  
Ranma, Akane, and Kuno stood downtown, staring up at Godzilla. They took deep breaths and walked towards it. When they reached it, they saw Ryoga.  
  
"Hey, Ryoga. I didn't know you'd be here," Ranma greeted him.  
  
Ryoga frowned. "I was trying to evacuate the city, but I got lost."  
  
"Did you try following the crowds of people?" Ranma asked, suppressing his laughter.  
  
Ryoga blushed. "Well, no..."  
  
"Stop fighting, you two!" Akane interrupted before Ranma could tease Ryoga more.  
  
Godzilla approached, and they all got ready. Kuno went up first, sword swinging. "Godzilla, if you defeat me, I shall allow you to go out with me!"  
  
Everyone sweatdropped. "He's gotten way too desperate lately," Akane commented.  
  
Godzilla flung Kuno through the air and out of Tokyo. As her arm swung, she hit a water tower and knocked it over, pouring the cold water all over those below. As the water dispersed, a little black pig appeared, seemingly out of nowhere.  
  
"P-chan! Where did you come from?" Akane asked as she hugged him. "This is no place for you, you might get hurt! No, go hide somewhere!" She put him down again, and he scampered off to hide behind a pillar. "Hey, where'd Ryoga go?" Akane asked, looking around. Ranma sighed and shook his head.  
  
Godzilla roared to remind them of her presence, then knocked over a pillar, which happened to be the one P-chan was hiding behind. The said pig squealed and jumped out of the way, barely missing it. Akane was furious. She ran up to Godzilla and kicked her into the air, yelling, "Godzilla, you jerk! You almost hurt P-chan!" The behemoth flew through the air and landed right into a hot spring, splashing some of the water on P-chan, who turned back into Ryoga. Everyone ran up to the spring, and saw not a monster, but a young girl in her place.  
  
"Excuse me, did you happen to see where Godzilla went?" Ranma asked her.  
  
"Yeah, I'm right here," she replied.  
  
"What?!" they all asked at once.  
  
"Let me explain. First of all, my name is Allie."  
  
"I'm Ranma, and this is-"  
  
"I know who you all are. I have read the first nine graphic novels, after all.  
  
She received a blank look from them.  
  
"Nevermind. Anyway, I was in China last year, visiting the cursed springs."  
  
*~FLASHBACK~*  
  
"This spring have legend, very tragic, of Godzilla who drown here 1500 year ago," the tour guide explained, gesturing to the spring they were standing by.  
  
"Cool," Allie replied. Suddenly, she miss-stepped and twisted her ankle, falling into the spring. "Crap!"  
  
"You stupid girl! You fall in Spring of Drowned Godzilla!"  
  
She emerged as a huge, green, lizard-like monster. She roared and ate the annoying tour guide, then headed towards Japan.  
  
~*END FLASHBACK*~  
  
By this time, Ryoga had returned, and had heard her story.  
  
"So, why'd you come here?" Akane asked her.  
  
"I came for Ryoga," she replied.  
  
"NANI?!?!" Ryoga asked as he stood up and backed away.  
  
"MWA HA HA!!! You're mine, bishie!!" she said as she jumped into a nearby lake and turned back into Godzilla.  
  
"NOOOO!!!!!" Ryoga yelled as he started running.  
  
Godzilla easily caught up to him and grabbed him. She walked off, letting out a triumphant roar, Ryoga struggling in her grasp.  
  
"Well, that was interesting," Akane said.  
  
"Aww, they make such a cute couple!" Ranma teased.  
  
"Hey, did you see where P-chan went?"  
  
"Akane, there's something you need to know about P-chan." Ranma proceeded to tell her about Ryoga's transformation. Her reaction?  
  
Ranma flew through the air once again, accompanied with the usual, "Ranma, you jerk! You're lying!"  
  
THE END  
  
Well, that was my first Ranma ½ fanfic. What did you think? Oh, and FYI, I'm not a Kuno hater, I just felt like bashing him a little. Also, I have no clue where Ranma and co. live, but if it isn't Tokyo, well....just go along with it! This was also my first self- insertion fic. Was it too corny? PLEEEEEEEEEASE review, even if it's a flame! I want to hear from you all! Thanks for reading!  
  
~ Nijuunigou ~  
  
By the way, for those of you who don't know, a bishie is short for a bishounen, which is Japanese for an attractive male. Also, "nani" is Japanese for "what." 


End file.
